It’s late. The TV is on, but I’m not really paying attention to it; I’m playing boggle on my laptop. I look up as Dewie walks into the living room wearing boxer shorts and a t-shirt, carrying a bag of Cheetos. She sits. She munches.
“Why are you eating Cheetos in your skivvies?”
“I don’t know. Just felt right.”
“Huh. It’s a good look for you.”
“Thanks.”
“What if you had to take the dog out? Would you go in your skivvies?”
“Probably.”
“How about to the mail box? Would you walk to the mailbox in your skivvies?”
“Probably.”
“Would you go without the cover of darkness?”
“Probably.”
“Cool. How about to the store? Would you go to the store in your skivvies?”
“Nope.”
“How about if someone offered you $20,000? Then would you go to the store in your skivvies?”
“Yep.”
“Yeah, me too. Would you go to the store in your skivvies and a birthday hat?”
“Why a birthday hat?
“I don’t know. They look dumb. Would you for $20,000?”
“Yep.”
“How about your skivvies, a birthday hat and a tube top?”
“How long would I have to stay in the store?”
“Long enough to buy some Tic-Tacs. Would you wear your skivvies, a birthday hat and a tube top into a
store to buy some Tic-Tacs for $20,000?”
“Yes.”
"Yeah, me too. How about your skivvies, a birthday hat and pasties?”
“No.”
“For $20,000? Are you sure?”
“Definitely no.”
“Huh. I would. How about your skivvies and TWO birthday hats? No tape or string, just the two hats.”
“Where would I put my money?”
“I don’t know, in your teeth?”
“No. Money’s dirty. I’m not putting that in my mouth. Would you?”
“Hell yeah. For $20,000 I’d go naked. They’d have to give me the money upfront though, because I’d probably need bail money. Indecent exposure is a misdemeanor, right?”
“Yep. Unless there’s kids in the store. Then you go on the sexual offender’s list.”
“Hmph. Well that just changes everything. I’m sleepy.”
“Me too.”
1 comment:
Where do ideas like this come from? I swear I didn't slap you in the head that hard!
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