There's Something in my Third Eye

So I recently had a dream about a friend I haven’t talked to in a while that stayed with me. I dreamed that she was emotionally in trouble and I couldn’t stop thinking about it so I dropped her a line to make sure she was ok. The conversation went like this:

Me: “ I had a dream about you last night that left me feeling kind of unsettled. Don't worry, it wasn't all sexalicious, you were depressed and emotionally in trouble. I don't believe that dreams are prophetic or anything, I was just thinking about you so I thought I'd check in. You doing OK?”

Friend: “I’m doing well these days! Now if you had had that dream a couple years ago, well I would've gotten you a turban. But I’m doing fine now! Thank you for checking.”

This got me thinking… how cool would it be to have a turban? People would totally assume that you are a good psychic, even if you were full of crap. The turban automatically makes you completely credible. I mean, who besides a world renowned psychic and fortune teller wears a turban? Well, Muslims, I guess, but I haven’t perfected my seductive eyes yet, so no one would believe that. Besides, my turban would have one of those fancy medallions in the middle with a feather sticking out of it. A purple feather, because purple is the preferred color of mystic type people.

Maybe I can get my own show, guessing the names of dead relatives and making comforting comments.  “I see the spirit of a man standing behind you.”

 “Yes! That’s my old boss that died recently!”

 “I see the letter… M…wait no…the letter P… but it could be an R”

“Oh my gosh! His name was Ricardo!” (glad she offered that, dodged a bullet there…)

“He wants me to tell you that he’s at peace now and to keep up the good work.”

“This is unbelievable! He used to say ‘keep up the good work!’ all the time!”

I could be a super star… all because I acquired a turban. Better yet, I could take a page from the pet psychic and pick an audience that offers absolutely no validation at all, like babies. I could be a baby psychic.

“Your baby just adores formula. He also wants to tell you he likes the color red. He wants you to dress him in red more often.  Oh and his tushy is a little sore. He wants you to use more baby powder. That will be $150.”

The turban holds infinite power. I gotta get me one of those.